Anachronism

“Why are you sitting at the crossroad, Mullah?”

“One day something will happen here and a crowd will gather. When that happens, I may not be able to get close enough. So I’m putting in my time now.”

Last years nests

“What are you doing in that tree Mullah?”
“Looking for eggs”.
“But those are last year’s nests!”
“Well, if you were a bird and wanted a safe place to lay eggs, would you build a new nest with everyone watching?”

Why ask me?

Nasrudin was riding along one day when his donkey took fright at something in its path and started to bolt. As he sped past them at an unaccustomed pace, some countrymen called out: “Where are you going so fast O Nasrudin?”
Mullah shouted, “Don’t ask me, ask my donkey!”

Old graves for new

“When I die,” said Nasrudin, “have me buried in an old grave.”
“Why?” asked his relatives.
“Because when Munkir and Nakir - the angels who record good and bad actions - come, I’ll be able to wave them on saying that this grave has been counted and entered for punishment already.”

Incomplete

Mullah Nasrudin surprised everyone by building his own tomb. At last, after one shortcoming after another had been corrected, the mason came to collect his money.
“It is not right yet, builder.”
“What more can be done with it?”
“We still have to supply the body.”

Truth

“What is truth?” a disciple asked Nasrudin.
“Something which I have never, at any time spoken, nor ever will.”

The Speculator

Nasrudin bought a large number of eggs and at once sold them at a lower price than he had bought them for. When asked why he did so he said: “Surely you don’t want me to be called a profiteer?”